blogspotnyajesslyndonk

Si Kunci Nakal dan Doa yang Terjawab

2005-08-05T08:27:00.000+10:00

Jadi peristiwa kurang menyenangkan (tapi hepi ending) ini bermula di sebuah pagi hari, tepatnya kamis 4 Agustus 2005, waktu gue mau berangkat skolah. Pagi itu gue lagi di rumah Wan abud* (Red. Bukan nama sebenarnya), agak terburu-buru karena telat masuk kuliah dan rumah dia agak jauh. Setelah semua barang yg mau dibawa terkumpul, mulai deh gue berhitung “1,2,3..” , 1 untuk dompet, 2 untuk kunci rumah, 3 untuk kunci mobil. Loh Loh loh… koq Cuma bisa mentok ampe 2? Mana yang ke-3????????!!! Panik panik panik… nyari2 kunci tapi ngga ketemu…. 30 menit berlalu dan masih ngga ketemu juga.. Jadi sudahlah gue nelfon temen2 kuliah dan bilang gue ngga masuk hari ini dan nitip absen. Seharian itu gue mencari2 dan banyak termenung, intinya berusaha mengingat2 kemana perginya si kunci nakal itu… sampe ketiduran pula (Wan Abud bilang “ wah… itu nunjukin banget ya betapa pentingnya kunci mobil itu buat kamu?”).
Gue cari di setiap pelosok apartment… you name it, I’ve searched it… di kolong meja, di rak buku, tempat tidur, di bawah sofa, di selipan2 sofa, di lemari, di kantong2 plastic, di tas (yang ini paling sering diobrak abrik), di dapur, di kulkas bawah, di kamar mandi…..di tong sampah….($!#^*!).. mobil juga udah 3x di check..pokonya semua tempat yg dari mungkin sampe ngga mungkin deh.. Tapi kunci nakal itu masih juga ngumpet dengan manisnya…Seharian itu dari pagi ampe malem gue ceritain ke beberapa orang baik di telfon maupun MSN dan pikiran gue mulai penuh dengan kemungkinan2 nyeremin seperti gimana kalo ada yg nemuin di jalan dan mobil gue dibawa lari? Wah pokonya panik gila deh! Hari itu dengan ajaibnya gue jadi banyak berdoa.. mohon2 biar kunci nakal itu mau nyerah dan nampakin muka jeleknya… Tapi sampe malem si kunci ngga nyerah juga.. Jadi gue mutusin untuk ngambil kunci serep di rumah… Setelah gue dapet “kembaran”nya, gue buka mobil dengan 1 harapan… bahwa si kunci nakal itu ngumpetnya di mobil…Ehhhhh ngga ada juga… yaudah lesu deh guenya… mungkin emang si kunci emang ngga mau ditemuin. Beberapa org yg gue curhatin bilang, kasih deh waktu beberapa hari, kalo masih ngga ketemu juga baru mobilnya dibawa ke dealer dan minta kunci baru untuk keamanan… Malem itu gue tidur, ngga lupa berdoa dulu, hanya bergantung pada “faith” dan jawaban dari Tuhan… Paginya gue masih ngarep2 pada kemungkinan si kunci mulai bosen ngumpet…pas lagi mikir2 ada suara2 kecil yg bilang kalo gue harus ngambilin meat pie buat lunchnya wan abud yg adanya di freezer… Sambil masih ngantuk2 gue buka deh tuh freezer.. pas mindah2in beberapa barang untuk ngambil meat pie sebuah benda jatuh ke lantai… dan jreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeennnnnnnnnnggggggggggggggg…. Ternyata si kunci ngumpetnya di freezer!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Ya ampun… kunci nakal itu memang suka aneh2 aja… wong winter2 gini kenapa milih freezer buat ngumpet??? Kenapa ngga di oven? (ngga lucu ya?) Gue langusng napsu ngambil di lantai sampe pas bangun kejedot pintu freezer… tapi rasa sakit kayanya langsung dikalahin sama perasaan seneng karena udah dipermukan sama si Kunci… gue langusng duduk manis sambil menggenggam si kunci sambil berdoa.. ya iya donk berterimakasih karena doa gue terjawab!! Trus abis itu gue baru inget, kalo malam sebelumnya gue emang sempet ngambil “Roti Prata yg frozen” di kulkas rumah gue untuk dibawa ke rumah Wan Abud, jadi ternyata waktu mengunci mobil malam itu, kuncinya ngga sengaja masuk ke kantong plastik roti prata di dalam tas gue.. dan roti prata itu gue masukin ke freezer…. ……………………………………..
Jadi the moral of the story is… kalo lo punya keyakinan dan lo percaya bahwa Tuhan bisa ngebantu elo di saat lo putus asa seputus-putusnya.. pasti Dia bakal bantu … Bayangin aja seharian gue cari keliling2 bisa ngga ada… dan waktu gue putusin untuk nyerahin masalah ini sama yang di Atas, besok paginya terjawab deh… gue yakin suara2 kecil di otak gue itu bukan suara gue sendiri… Thank You, God… Thank You… Seneng banget deh sekarang, dan gue berpesan sama si kunci nakal supaya dia ngga nakal2 lagi dan ngga boleh ngumpet seharian bahkan semaleman juga….The End.

Note: Maaf ya kalo ada yang ngarepin dari judulnya kalo cerita ini bakal menjadi sebuah cerita indah dan bukan cerita bodoh…tapi kalo yg dari awal udah tau bahwa ceirtanya bakal agak ngaco… Well there you go…

KNIFE AND FORK

2005-04-17T18:15:00.000+10:00

what do you need when you want to eat a piece of steak?
yes.. a knife AND a fork.
not just a knife , not just a fork.. you NEED both of them.
Knife has a function of cutting your steak, fork doesnt.
Fork has a function of holding your steak in place while you're cutting it and to pick your piece of steak up, knife doesnt.
Maybe we can force ourselves to eat with just a knife, but how troublesome would it be to try to use the knife to pick up your steak? moreover, how are you gonna hold your steak while you cut it? dont say "just use your hands".. we're talking about proper hygenic eating here..
and vice versa, you can try to just use a fork to eat your steak but you gotta have a strong jaw and a strong sets of teeth to be able to do so..
my point is... you can enjoy and eat your steak happily if you have both knife and fork... but under other circumstances in life, you cant just have both.. you have to choose 1 between 2 equally important things and have to forgo the other one...
it is possible to survive with one but you would wish you have the other to complete your life..
as it also applies to eating a steak, it is possible to eat the steak with just a knife or a fork, but life would be easier if you have both...
a solution would be to train ourselves to be able to eat a steak properly with just a fork.. it will take some time to ignore the absence of a knife but i suppose one would just need to get use to it... the same may be applied to our lives... it will be tough... but you just cant have everything you want...

one of those days

2005-04-10T20:14:00.000+10:00

Everyone have their ups and downs.. there are days when you feel blissfully happy and there are days when you feel so down you wanna knock your head against the wall..These feelings can change overnight or just within hours..
I'm having one of those "down" days.. in fact today is a pretty extreme case.. i never really breakdown and cry before.. very very seldom, almost never... but just about a few minutes ago i did.. and whats killing me is that i don't know exactly WHY i cried..

Women would usually relate these days as their PMS (Pre/Post Menstrual Syndrome).. which is when their hormones react in some ways or whatever that can have effects such as moodswings, lost/gain appetite and other shit.. dont ask me about the real science in it.. i dont know.. i guess it is just the mystery of nature.. But I'm trying not to relate what i'm experiencing with dat.. i usually do, but someone once told me, "dont make it as a habit to use PMS as an excuse for bad mood bla..bla..bla.." So i'm trying to listen to him and yet i'm not used to actually figure out why i'm having such bad mood without blaming it on PMS...

So I just sat here in my room alone.. trying hard to brush away that weight that keeps pushing me down and down.. I thought about it... why is this happening? i came up with a conclusion that it is because of a mixture of things, i'm all stressed out with my uni work.. i dont know shit about what i'm doing.. i always feel that i'm doing a wrong course.. but i cant turn away, its too late.. Now i have piles of reports, assignments and tests to be done.. i dont even know where to start.. secondly.. i've been having this thought (which i cant share with you here, sorry) that is bothering me once in a while... and it is somehow comin back to me at the moment...

I have been feeling tired and exhausted for the past few days.. my bones and joints are just sore..its not because i've been losing sleep.. i been getting lots of sleeps.. but i'm just tired...worn out..

I guess another reason that i cried is because i always blame other people, people that i love, for the way i feel.. i always dump my anger/anxiety onto them.. i would say really bad things and sharp words.. even if they dont deserve it... i cried because i dont have a self control.. i blurt out words without thinkin.. i act without thinkin.. and in the end.. when they are hurt (even when they dont show it), i'm hurt even more because i know sorry doesnt really cure.. It's like when you nail a wooden board.. even if you pull the nail out, the hole will still be there.. it will never be the same smooth board ever again... Today, i think i hurt/somehow annoyed my bf, and then in the afternoon i talked to my parents on the fone (whom i have not spoken to for more than a week).. and yet i still manage to be rude... I would say that i'm one hell of a bitch today.. and what hurt most is that I didnt mean it..

As a person.. people may think that i'm all cheerful and tough...that i can take any shits dump on me... i guess again.. i have worn my mask well... too well that sometimes i even fooled myself..I think about stuff.. but i hesitate and most of the time too lazy to act.. I know that i have to get things straight.. pu t myself together.. but the thing is i'm the best procrastinator ever.. i got things to be done.. mostly uni related, i have to get password for my netbank, i want to change to ADSL, i want to repair my suitcase, yadda yadda.. all those can be done if i actually concentrate and make a schedule and follow them.. but up until now.. i haven.. people must be tired of hassling me.. Yet.. i haven change...I think i wanna do all those this week.. I hope..
back to what i'm sayin about me as a person... i guess what best describe me as a person is dat i'm that kind that always don't say what i mean and dont mean what i say.. it seems that the connections between my brain, my heart and my mouth been damaged for ages...

I dunno why i cried and whats the point of all the things i blab about above..i have no conclusion..I'm just trying to feel better and i thought writing about it will ease the pain.. hmpf.. calling it a pain seems too extreme.. but i cant help but feelthe burden.. maybe its like carrying a 100kg sack on my back...i'm so messed up... i'm a closed person.. i dont really show what i'm feeling to others..its not easy for me.. but it's torturing, but the thing is I know that no one really understands me.. not even myself...So how do i expect anyone to understand me when myself cant... argh...i guess all i wrote above is just bullshit.. people who read this most probably be thinkin that i'm sick by now... sigh... i just want everything to go away in one blink.. but even idiots know that thats impossible.. so i gotta face all this... i just have to keep thinkin that worse shits happen to others.. so i should be grateful and not sweat about all this... sigh........

breathe

2005-03-30T08:19:00.000+10:00

i see love and beauty all around
i also see the sadness that's embedded in your frown
i wonder why you choose not to talk to those who surround
i sense a fear of lifting heavy feet
higher than you want to, i just want to believe your truth
you stand there but you do not cast a shadow
you walk away with every word you choose not to say
i suppose that moving on paints a new colour for each day
i don't like to see dreams put on the shelf
to deal with on that one day
cause i believe in breathing just for today
i just want to know that you're okay
i believe in for today, i just want to know that you're okay

-part of the lyric of "Breathe in Now"-

to whom it may concern,
you are a beautiful being, i love you for you and not for other things. I will never know the pain but all i know is that i'll do anything to ease it and make it go away. i want to gather the shattered pieces of you and put it back together. i love you.

Listening to "misread"

2005-01-18T01:21:00.000+11:00

today.. ada yg nyuruh gue nulis di blogspot nan gersang ini... so here i am.......thinkin...posting... typing...hmm....

hehehehehehe...

well honestly... my holiday so far has been a blast..! makanya i dont have much time right now to write everything i did and will be doing during this holiday...!

MAYBE... when my ass is back in sydney (i will be takin off on the 12th next month) , i will be so bored and tired of my UNI LIfe... i will write every single friggin thing that i did during my summer break... really...

but as for now... all i have to say is i'm enjoyin myself.. i mean really enjoyin myself... why dont I? i got my family with me.. met my adorable grandpa.. and most importantly i have spent lotsa hella good time with my dear dear friendss.. (those yg ngga di sydney... for those yg di sydney.,. i'm missin you guys loh! we will re-unite soon *wink*)
yes... as i was sayin... i'm glad i met and have spend lotsa quality time with my friends... gosh... some of them left alreadi... pergi ke negri2 dimana mreka belajar... sigh... i'm missing them.. really.. i really do miss them... these guys sure know who i'm talkin about... you guys are the shit! *in a good way ofcoz..*
and i cant believe we havta be apart for another .. hm.. what? 1 month or 6 months or even a year? fuck... haree was right ( when asked what he wants at the moment...his answer wus "pintu kemana saja" --> doraemon) i would love that too rii!!... i think we should all have one.. u know... kalo nanti kita smua saling kangen and need a hug and some coffee... kita bisa janjian ketemuan dimana gitu and yg pastinya kapan aja... hmpf... i'm so sad... yet heppi ... sad becoz some of my fellas had left.. hepi becoz lots of them are still here to chill wit me.. although yg paling disayangkan adalah most everyone yg lagi liburan has a part time job... huh! cuma tersisa me and ary yg tiap hari bengang bengong... ampe bosen... hihihi piss ry..
udah ah... tadinya kan mo nulis dikit.. gimana seh!

sebagai pengingat apa yg mo ditulis nanti saat lagi bosen2nya di sydney, here is the list of summer experiences yg gue inget :
*malem taon baruan... hohoho all the alcohol and video “semi-bokep”..
*kegilaan terhadap chai latte coffeebean
*retro RnB nite *yea.. uhuhh*
*EDDY bubur junet and robak.. God i used to love that place.. but skrg enek
*that really cool lounge di EX
*reuni smagers
*met some primary skool friendsss
*THE incredibles..... oh oh ohhhh... and KUNGFU hustleee
*dara dan ke-"MUREH"-an nya dia selama summer holiday (GOOd God, ra!)
*nyetir ke glodok and pangeran jayakarta.. *it wasnt good i tell ya!*
*ayam2 pitik dari ryan yg diberi nama surti & tedjo
*singapore (pertama kalinya setelah sekian lama bisa have such a great quality time with my parents and siblings..)
*kenzo and keiko (anjing2 ShietZu nya my bro’s girl, Cath)
* Me and Cikal bugging ary with the “Milkshake” song, and that “Tempted to touch” song... what’s your problem, Ry?
*abraham di-smoothing... trus jesslyn juga dismoothing..
*coffee club?
*setiabudi ??
*gosh... there is much much more.. but so sorry cant list all of em down coz i gotta roll...
but yeah.. since udah ada list untuk mengingatkan...i'll definitely write about 'em next time..
for now... adios.. Peace and love to you all...

2005-01-11T02:38:00.000+11:00

Truth Is
by Fantasia Barrino

Ran into an old friend yesterday
Caught me by surprise when he called my name
He was a familiar face, from a chapter in my past
Talked for awhile, I smiled and then
Said that he was seeing somebody and
Told me this was gonna last
Showing me her photograph

And all the feelings I thought were gone
Came rushing back to me at once
Tried to smile and hide the way I felt
But I was thinking to myself

[chorus]
Truth is I never got over you
Truth is wish I was standing in her shoes
Truth is and when it's all said and done
Guess I'm still I love with you
Truth is I never should have let you go
Truth is and it's killing me cause now I know
Truth is and when it's all said and done
Guess I'm still I love with you

We reminisced on the way things used to be
Shared a couple laughs, shared some memories
Talked about the things that changed
Some for good and some for bad
Then he said goodbye and he paid for lunch
Promised that we'd always keep in touch
Grabbed my bags and grabbed my thoughts
Walked away and that was that

And all the feelings I thought were gone
Came rushing back to me at once
Tried to smile and hide the way I felt
But I was thinking to myself

[chorus]
Truth is I never got over you
Truth is wish I was standing in her shoes
Truth is and when it's all said and done
Guess I'm still I love with you
Truth is I never should have let you go
Truth is and it's killing me cause now I know
Truth is and when it's all said and done
Guess I'm still I love with you

(IT's a damn good song...)

2004-11-20T18:58:00.000+11:00

AND.........Anotha one...!! yupe yupee.. bought 2 sunnies todayy.. so Happiii...

2004-11-20T18:56:00.000+11:00

New sunniESsss cheapos cheapos at Glebe MarKettt... but i'm still brokee... *sniff*

2004-11-09T15:16:00.000+11:00

me myself and I

t o r n

2004-11-09T14:57:00.000+11:00

Like a warm winter night. Unexpected, yet longed-for. A new kind of vibe. I've never felt before.

i'm hypnotized. You're all around me. I couldnt help it. I know enough to let you in.

As we grow closer each day the more i questioned my self, the more i try to deny. Trapped. i'm trapped in my emotions.

Can't you see? i'm torn and twisted. battling with my mind. I want you to go but i want you to stay.

you Are messing with my feelings, crushing my core. It is hurting me, killing me. Still i beg for more.

I Know that this won't work. I know that this is wrong. How could i let myself stumble. You and I just doesn't spell "right".

I tried to ran far far away. To the deepest of the ocean. But it's like you put a leash on me. Every sight of the ray, the sense of the wind and the touch of the sand. Reminds me of you.

I'm torn and twisted. Would i be a fool to give in? Lost and bewildered i will be. Guess what? you are to blame.

2004-10-13T01:47:00.000+10:00

The Story Behind the Picture: I finally got my Spongebob Squarepants Inflatable Toy..! for those who dont know, i've been longing to have this toy for months..! I pry it everytime i pass that store Robert and Angelo at Oxford St, i never got the chance to get to that store... One day when i finally went there...guess what...? IT'S NOT FOR SALE..i was pissed, i was soo sad.. my mood went down all the way..I want my spongebob!!!! and the stoopid salesperson wouldnt tell me where he bought it....Ryan was there with me..Apparently without me knowing it, he searched for that particular toy on the net that night, he found one and got it sent from the US..Me? I have the slightest idea about it..know nottin at all..Today, after lecture, me ryan and erlin went back to my crib to get my car and hit the beach (becoz it was freakinly hot and sizzling!)..I went to my room and changed, then... SURPRISE..!! There it was..the same toy i've been dying for.. staring right at me.. I jumped up and down obviously overjoyed..hahaha..I dunno what to say, but for sure it was definitely one of the SWEETEST thing a guy ever done for me.. really, Ry..Thank you..

http://noracom.net/eng/fortune/color_cheki1.php

2004-10-12T23:05:00.000+10:00

check out the website... i'm a black wolf and somehow most of the descriptions fits me.. but still.. some dont..

You are Black Wolf person, who gives an impression of being difficult and rather stiff.
But you are also simple and honest.
You are responsible person and are able to observe other people well. You are intelligent and never lose your composure.
You lead life slowly at your pace keeping your dreams and hopes.
You tend to be calm and objective, but you also have complicated side to your personality.
You are an artistic type of person.
You have good sense of humor, and have lots of talent, and are good at making conversation.
You are indifferent to public opinion and custom.
You strictly stick to your philosophy and rules of life.
You have unique identity, and people tend to see you as an inconsiderate person who is not prepossessed with common sense.
Your attitude gives an impression of unemotional cold hearted person.
You may end up receiving great fortune and honor from no where.
But this may be far from your will.
Your defiant energy is great.
You can use your individuality to do things that no other person can, and lead happy fulfilled life.

there goes my holiday...

2004-10-04T23:07:00.000+10:00

okay... hmm.. i dunno where to start....*thinkin hard..*
a-ha! i know.. lets recap the things that happened during the holiday..
firstly, there wus nightlight, acara PPIA unsw, i was one of the crews.. sum flaws -->started kinda late, the manager wus a dick and the bouncers were unbelievable.. a couple (well a lot) of guests complained about the long wait and tight security.. me? i gotta admit i didnt pull enuff weight or you may say i slacked...good things--> i had lots to drink, uh-huh uh-huh as u may have seen my picture on my previous post so i slacked...but its all good, the "acara" wus full house!, lotsa sexy dancers shakin their bootis...yah to sum up it wus an exhausting yet fun night for lotsa people...
the rest of the holiday? haha... misi awal sih mo ngejar smua ketinggalan dan bikin tugas2 yg numpukkkk... tapi... as alwayss... i couldnt resist temptations and oh well, i'm a procrastinator.. so yeah... sempet diajak Road TRip ke melb, it wus a very very enticing offer walau sempet mikir juga karena i was the only girl (10 straight hours with the blokes? hohoho..mikir duluu..) ..
Pergi Road trip batal gara2 tante gue tiba2 dateng and kalo gue cabut ke melb nanti ketauan donk sama mamah papah?! yaudah.. jadi dengan berat hati menolak untuk pergi.. dan lagipula i THOUGHT i could use my free time to actually do my uni work..and also go bake myself at the beach...
well yeah.. day by day passed.. sempet beberapa kali nyesel gak ikut ke melb.. firstly the weather wus like shit last week.. i mean it wus real HELL... ujan deras ampyak bberatt!..so forget the beaches... lalu about me doin my work and catching up? *geleng2* nope.. didnt do much except taping channel10 for my foodchoice oroject (one of the many projects yet to be done..)... and the rest of the time wus spent berkeliling2 dan bergossip dan menggendutkan diri.. hihihi... contohnya bolak balik nandang di unilodge, jemputin mandra-nya sydney (piss yo, pezzo.. if you're reading this!), jemput org jam 11 malem ngajak ke krispy kreme karena gue ngidam dan ternyata yg di city tutupp... lalu? what happened next? Ryan and jesslyn go to krispy kreme (er... it's like harold and kumar go to white castle)... yupee we went to the KK at the AIRPORT!,... lalu we went crazy karena ternyata masih buka and we got 2 dozens.. yipeess.. Uhhuh Uhhuh... fatty doughnuts down my throat... oh yeah.. speaking about food.,.. i have been craving for sushi these past 3 days... and sempet makan sushi terus for 2 straight days... oh my gosh.. imagine those carbs.. (like when spongebob said to Squidwart when he ate tonnes of crabby patties " it will go straight to your thighs!!!!!" ..whoa..boy it wus one scary episode..and gilanya i can see myself being like dat!)...
apalagi yah?? oh yeah.. akhirnya si "biru" udah bocel velg-nya.. uhuhuhu nge-gresek aspal di depan broadway.. "uhuhuhu tayank sorry yahh.. muah muah...janji deh lain kali aku nyetir kamu yg bener,,," hihihihi...
sabtu lalu?? ikutan arisan"ibu2 dan bapak2" tapi cuma jadi pemandu sorak.. hihihi... oh yah dan supir.. but yeah that wus funn.. trus spontaneously went clubbin to HOme.. agak bete sih kalo yg itu.. HOME bar jelek skrgg! jangan mau ke sana yah temen2! kita cari yg baru ajaa nyok nyok nyokkk....oh oh oh and also that nite.. i called in to "gemakriya" (indonesian radio in perth) becoz my dear cousin popoy skrg jadi penyiarrrr!! hihihi and yep i wus nervous at first but loosen up in time.. she made me spill out the most embarrasing moment in my life.. so i told her.. the tragedy at city beach surfshop (Perth), yep... blue-black as big as a dinner plate on my thigh.. *sakit!!*
so yeah that wus a very very brief summary of the holz... as you can see beberapa rencana batal ( i.e. bikin tugas, tanning, roadtrip) but hey.. the bright side was lotsa unexpected stuffs came up .. spontaneous stuffs and its all good...................
ohh.. one more thing.. yesterday and today wus kinda like hell for me.. apart from panicking about my mountains of assignments that are due in no time.. i think i am experiencing PMS or sumthin... i felt that i couldnt breathe (sesek nafas).. i dunno why... its like my inside wanted to scream real loud... it was one of those rare days where i wanted to cry but i got no reason for crying... it wus terrible yesterday.. today i'm getting better but sesek-nya masih berasa dikit.. i dunno, apa emang gue lagi tired of myself.. ato emang kesepian in a way... i have no idea, if only i can have the answer.. but anyway.. i keep trying to convince myself things like these come up once in a while in once life.. apalagi cewe yg suka moodswing kalo lagi PMS.. so now i'm not too worried.. and besides i know i got great family and fabolous friends.. some people are far more unlucky.. hihihi so yeah i fell down but i'm slowly pulling myself back on my feet again and will walk or even start running... =)...
whoaa... panjang juga... well enuff blabbing for today.. better kick start on my marketing assignments... =) goodnite you all...kiss kiss..
__jesslyn__

gak penting

2004-09-29T01:43:00.000+10:00

ada kesalahan pada jam-jam yg disebutkan di foto2 dibawah... maksudnya am bukan pm...
anjrit.. ga penting banget... huhuhu
sydney hujannn.. jesslyn sedihhh......

2004-09-29T01:34:00.000+10:00

at home around 5am, after 2 shots (well okay..1.5 shots , the other half i gave it to topher) of Bacardi 151( 75% alc.? Shieeeeeeett...!) and 1 servings of contreiau... and zippyzip of vodka gak enak.. yah muka gue kira2 gini deh...

2004-09-29T01:31:00.000+10:00

around 3.40am... coba liat deh cowo "manis" bersepatu "pump shoes MERAH" yg ke-2 dari kiri... farryyy u prettypretty girl... hihihi gak denk.. farry wus being a gentleman karena wanda kakinya lecet, jadi tukeran sepatu... tapi tetepp.. farry cantik.....

2004-09-29T01:29:00.000+10:00

jelek smuanya...masa gue keliatan leher doank? fezzo si marmut jelekkk...ngambil fotonya bodoh...

2004-09-29T01:27:00.000+10:00

this one was about 12.51pm...

2004-09-29T01:24:00.000+10:00

malam nightlight around 12.50pm...dancing the night awayy..

2004-09-29T01:22:00.000+10:00

NightLight RnB and HipHop Dance Competition and paRTY 24 Sept 2004.. started at 10pm...

2004-09-29T01:16:00.000+10:00

ini pas acara 17 agustusan di sydney...

That Someone

2004-09-14T21:34:00.000+10:00

Okay.. this may surprise some of you...but in case u haven notice, every now and then i do write poems..sometimes its about the world.. sometimes about my friends..sometimes about love ..or about anything!..its just a way of expressing my emotions and feelings...
some of you may find it silly and mushy.. some of you may think "oh my God..! that is so not you!"..some of you may find that i am very amateur (well I am..*malu*) ...and (maybe) some of you may like it (fingers crossed)... but whatever it is that you may think or whatever comment that you may give me ..i will accept it with gratitude.. (or maybe i'll kick your ass! hihihi just kidding..) Anyway.. (please dont laugh).. this poem is actually for the guys to read... but girls can read it too if the want =0)...

THAT SOMEONE
Someday …

You’ll meet that someone…who will make you cherish every moment spent…
That someone will need you as much as you need her…and she will strive to make u happy anyway she can…

She will be someone who will make the effort to bake even if she has never done so before… you will eat it and go “Yummm…” even if she burns the cake…

Someone you’ll introduce to your mother by saying “Hey mum… this is the girl I’ve been telling you about…” with a grin from ear-to-ear showing that you’re proud…

She will stay after a dinner invitation at your parents’ house just to help your mother with the dishes…and help her prepare dessert of chocolate strawberry kisses…

Someone you’ll lie under the stars with and talk about the constellations or your grandma’s cookie recipe…or maybe even have a guessing game of what may be hidden under the sea…

She will kiss you goodnight on your forehead and the next morning a kiss on the tip of your nose and say “wake up, lazy bum..!” and pull you out of bed…

You’ll have a posh dinner on the weekend just the two of you… or maybe a movie night at home with mountains of popcorns and chips too…

She will go for a shopping with you and ask you to try on everything she picks… you’ll try it on even if it makes you look like a dick…

You’ll have pillow fights on Sundays and real fights on Mondays… (‘coz everyone is always on a bad mood at Mondays!)…

Someone who will actually listen to your lame jokes... and pretend to laugh so loud until she chokes...

She will be someone who will annoy you in some ways every now and then… but also someone whom you’ll forgive every now and again…

You’ll find that someone someday…or maybe you don’t realize that she has found you and is trying to work her way (to you)…

(Can I be your “that someone?)

Sydney, 14 sept 2004

(PS: there might be some gramatical errors , i'm terribly sorry.. huhuhu..have to do it in a hurry... --> gosh.. even that rhymes!) tee hee...

2004-09-12T00:55:00.000+10:00

isenk ahh.... daymnn.. koq jadi sangar yah? oh well... i'll post foto2 yg lebih "manis" nanti... hihihihi

2004-09-12T00:30:00.000+10:00

just testing if i know how to post a picture.

bloody assaulters. i hate them. f***in hate them. period.

2004-09-11T19:19:00.000+10:00

Sexual assaulters. yes. they are everywhere. sexual assault (n.) -->
Conduct of a sexual or indecent nature toward another person that is accompanied by actual or threatened physical force or that induces fear, shame, or mental suffering. i experienced two quite minor ones. but still, it made me feel disgusted all the same. hate them. loathe them. i was actually planning to type down my experiences but wus too lazy to do so, so instead.. i just paste the conversation i had with my friend when i was telling him the story. sorry for those of yous who dont undastand indo, sorry to be you. =p.
This is a conversation between me and ade, recorded saturday 11sept 2004.
falling head over heels for amelie poulain says:
galaknyaaa
bloody assaulters. i hate them. says:
hihihihi
bloody assaulters. i hate them. says:
gue lagi kesel
falling head over heels for amelie poulain says:
knapaa?
bloody assaulters. i hate them. says:
ada sexual assaulters yg wondering around di sydney
bloody assaulters. i hate them. says:
shit.
bloody assaulters. i hate them. says:
baru 2 hari udah ada 2 org aneh
falling head over heels for amelie poulain says:
serius loe?
falling head over heels for amelie poulain says:
serem amet siehh
bloody assaulters. i hate them. says:
iya!
bloody assaulters. i hate them. says:
makanya
bloody assaulters. i hate them. says:
gue jiji banget
falling head over heels for amelie poulain says:
yg kena orang apa?
falling head over heels for amelie poulain says:
asia ato bule?
bloody assaulters. i hate them. says:
er......
bloody assaulters. i hate them. says:
maksud gue...
bloody assaulters. i hate them. says:
gue kena
bloody assaulters. i hate them. says:
walau tingkat ringan
falling head over heels for amelie poulain says:
oohhh
falling head over heels for amelie poulain says:
diapaain jess?
bloody assaulters. i hate them. says:
jadi yg pertama di coles gitu... ada org itali (kayanya) bapak2 jelek gitu.. dia papasan ma gue trus bilang hey beautiful trus ngomongnya deket banget di kuping gue plus tangan nyenggol gitu bloody assaulters. i hate them. says:
jiji..
falling head over heels for amelie poulain says:
taee malesin bangett
bloody assaulters. i hate them. says:
yg second.. baru kmaren malem.. di star city... gue lagi main the big wheel and rame banget... trus ada org umur 40an gitu.. kaya itali2 juga.. trus dia berdiri di belakang gue trus u know lah
bloody assaulters. i hate them. says:
i can describe lah de... gue terlalu jiji
bloody assaulters. i hate them. says:
cant
falling head over heels for amelie poulain says:
gile ada ape jess
falling head over heels for amelie poulain says:
knapa tiba2 loe mengundang gitu
falling head over heels for amelie poulain says:
hehehe
bloody assaulters. i hate them. says:
ugh
bloody assaulters. i hate them. says:
mana gue tau
bloody assaulters. i hate them. says:
ini daging lagi lari ke pantat sama paha semua kali'
bloody assaulters. i hate them. says:
yuck huiahiuahiua
falling head over heels for amelie poulain says:
hehehe
falling head over heels for amelie poulain says:
mestinya loe tampar aja langsung
bloody assaulters. i hate them. says:
gila ah
bloody assaulters. i hate them. says:
kalo yg di startcity tuh gue baru nyadar setelah beberapa lama... trus gue kan sempet nengok trus judes gitu
bloody assaulters. i hate them. says:
abis itu orgnya cabut
falling head over heels for amelie poulain says:
dasar dah
falling head over heels for amelie poulain says:
gak jelas abist

Oh well.. there is a possibility that i'm mad becoz the guys are old bags.. would it be different if they were cute hunky young men? i dunno *grin n shrugs*

a very productive day

2004-09-03T19:09:00.000+10:00

FRiday 3rd Sept 2004.
Arrive at the campus Library at 10am, met edwin. INITIAL PLAN: Study for Biochem and FoodChem Midsession exam (can't decide which to do first...both are extremely exciting..*not*) ..We sat down, the lib wus pretty cozy... we started chatin bout cars..so we chat.. chat..yadda-yadda-yadda...Drrtt..Drrtt...Wanda on the other line.. She said"Jess, where u at?" (at the library).."watcha duin?" (studyin..hmpf...gak denk).."can I come ova?" (sure).."Bye" (bye)..
after we hung up, i went to the uni store to grab some lollies and met ryan...so we stroll back to the lib and wanda was alreadi there... So the four of us started gossipin bout wanda's psychotic neighbour who just cant leave her alone...
The clock is now showing 11.30am... Woopsiess.. its gym time! so me,wanda, and ry waved our goodbye to edwin and i promised him i'll meet him again at1pm to "continue" studyin..
Next scene, THE GYM.. me and ry exercised for an hour (if u call that an exercise..,it seems that its more like a dumb session, huh ry? --> u were so amazed by those Fit-Balls..haha)..
Then... 12.15 pm, i waited for sylvia to pick me up so we can go to the upper campus together (all ya UNSW students must know what i Mean..)..
I was PLANNing to have ow fat chicken avocado wrap fo lunch (i was pretty freaked owt when i weigh meself at the gym, gained a whooping 2kgs for cryin' owt loud!).. but evil sylvia managed to persuade me to have lunch at Pinangsia NoodLe...arghhhhhh........
Scene three... back at the lib..found a spot on level3 biomed library (or u can call it the science hell).. sat there for a few minutes...munchin on Wonka Nerds and Kenman's 40Cents lollies... figgeted for a while... then.... uh-oh..uh-oh... whats that? my eyes started closing...ZzZzZzzz(u dont wanna know what i dreamt about, its too weird!).. i woke up "udah ngeces...." hm... that was a nice nap... hah?!!?!? its been more than 1/2 hour... So i started readin again... Triacylglycerols are esters of glycerols and long chain of fatty acids....ZzZzZzZzZzz.... (1/2 hour later).. That's it! i'm goin home..! (edwin, whom i thought would be studyin like crazy was also asleep on top of the lect notes..HAha!)... Sylvia just got back from the toilet, dumping her filth...She then said "udah ah.. lets go home, i'm so sleepy nih!)... So we went downstairs and as we headed to the lib exit, we just remembered we havta print out sum stuffs... so we did.. as well as checkin the "enticing" friendster website...hihihi...
Scene 4, my bro picked me up... we went toy'r'us and i got meself a Cluedo, fun fun fun detective board game.. shit... i regreted the fact that i didnt grab the simpson's edition.. it would've been cooler.. but its a diff. of 30 freakin dolla!.. oh well.. cant complain.. its still the same thing.. potayto potato...
7.30pm... went to Subway at Randwick drivin my brand new wheels... must admit i had a hard time tryin ta get out of the garage (which to my defence is freakin tricky!)....fak... when i got ta subway I ordered the turkey breast and bacon Wrap (as seen on the ad "for carb-councious people")...the stupid waitress couldnt wrap.. have u ever seen a wrap in a shape of a square? idiot woman.. still tryin to defend herself when i complained.. she said "well thats how we are trained to make it.." WOMAN! if a farkin SQUAre... its so obvious its diff. to the pic on display.. geeez...!
scene 6(or 7 ? or 8? i dunno..) .. back at home.. eatin ma subway ... the clock's now showing 9.15pm..and i'm sittin here in front of my laptop typin all this crap...So... what happened to my study day? turns out that i've only read 1 page out of a big pile of foodchem notes (let alone BIOChem..)...i dunno how i should feel rite now.. i mean .. i've just wasted one bloody whole day.. but thats what i'm good at... so........

some things i just never learn...

2004-08-17T00:24:00.000+10:00

One evening, on the chilly 15th of august to be exact, I was sittin on my study table struggling to finish my Food Chemistry Lab report. As I was working (with a searing pain in my head), I thought to myself.. “Hey..there are many things that I have encountered in my life that should’ve teach me a lesson but it seems that I never learn”. I mean, when u were a kid, u wouldn’t know that a burning candle is hot and would only learn not to touch it when u have touched it once and felt the “uncomfortable” heat. *Owkay.. that is not a very good example.. it kinda sounds dump.. but hey! Thats what happened to me so I’ll stick with that*.. Anyway.. kayanya gampangan pake bahasa Indonesia..*sok2 inggris awalnya jadi pusing sendiri..hihihi.. okei hmm hmm.. serius nih…jadi gue mikir, kayanya banyak “pelajaran2” yg kita udah dapet yg harusnya bisa bikin kita nyadar dan berubah… contohnya, kalo orangtua lo bilang “jangan ngerokok ya”.. dan elo udah sempet beberapa kali ke-gep, tapi tetep aja kan ngga jera? Trus lo tau setelah one real bad hangover gara2 minum terlampau (I mean bener2 TOO MUCH) banyak dan sampe akhirnya lo seharian ngga enak badan.. tapi tetep aja lo bakal ngelakuin lagi sampe lo sakit lagi dan ulang lagi..DAN sakit LAGI…Another example, lo pernah keabisan duit di bank account sampe bener2 makan aja susah misalnya abis gara2 shopping and minum2… tapi tetep aja, begitu dikirimin duit sama bokapnyokap, dimana ada kesempatan blanja ato minum2 atau apalah.. tetep aja tu duit kepake abis lagi sampe (again) makan aja susah…Yet another example.. kaya malem 15th august kmaren, I had the whole day to do my stupid chemLab report, dari pagi sampe malem loh kosongnya ..dan gue udah sengaja ngga kemana2 untuk nyisihin waktu.. karena gue tau bakal makan waktu lama banget.. tapi TETEppHH aja… baru bener2 jera and sadar diri waktu jam udah nunjukin pk.8.00 malam.. pdhl gue udah sering banget not being able to finish studying for a test hanya gara2 procrastination.. tapi tetep aja kayanya gak bisa nolak godaan2.. pdhl gue cape dan gue tau kalo gue bikin tugas itu dari siang pasti jam 8 harusnya dah selesai...Jadi pada intinya.. gue cuma mo curhat.. apa emang Cuma gue atau memang smua org juga ngalamin hal yg sama? Dimana kita tau konsekuensi tindakan kita dan pernah ngalamin betapa merugikan konsekuensinya tapi ya tetep aja kayanya otomatis ngga bisa berubah? Kayanya ini bisa dibilang masalah self-control..tapi ngeri juga ya, soalnya juju raja I have a very bad self control ditambah lagi I’m a true procrastinator..Bingung juga kan kalo begini sampe tua? Ya ngga sih? Hmmm.. kayanya agak2 ngga makna ya diskusi di atas? Hahaha sorry deh yg terlanjur baca,… emg pada dasarnya blog ini untuk naro uneg2/”sampah a.k.a Dump” gue… jadi mendingan lo baca kalo lagi gak ada kerjaan aja.. but I assure u, gue bakal masukin topik2 makna deh kadang2..hehehe...semoga bahasan ini bisa menyentuh hati kalian (tai ah..!) biar pada sadar!... kalo ternyata lo sama kaya gue.. TOS DULU DONK!! Hahaha.. adios..

favourite song on my current play list

2004-08-16T19:52:00.000+10:00

maroon5 is awesome. adam levine is hot. nuff said.

She will be loved.

Beauty queen of only eighteen
She had some trouble with herself
He was always there to help her
She always belonged to someone else
I drove for miles and miles
And wound up at your door
I've had you so many times but somehow
I want more
I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved
And she will be loved
Tap on my window, knock on my door
I want to make you feel beautiful
I know I tend to get so insecure
It doesn't matter anymore
It's not always rainbows and butterflies
It's compromise that moves us along
My heart is full and my door's always open
You can come anytime you want
I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved
And she will be loved
And she will be loved
And she will be loved
I know where you hide
Alone in your car
Know all of the things that make you who you are
I know that goodbye means nothing at all
Comes back and begs me to catch her every time she falls
Tap on my window, knock on my door
I want to make you feel beautiful
I don't mind spending every day
Out on your corner in the pouring rain, oh
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved
And she will be loved
And she will be loved
And she will be loved
Please don't try so hard to say goodbye
Please don't try so hard to say goodbye
I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Please don't try so hard to say goodbye

.....

2004-08-15T10:41:00.000+10:00

one night... i was sittin on the bus all alone.. headin back home after some regular coffee session wit my fellas... and i didnt know why, weird random thoughts came zooming thru my head.. i was thinkin about my Indonesia.. about the world and the fact that it is goin crazier than ever...i felt that my chest wus gonna explode..and i gotta let something out... therefore i wrote a poem..tapi maafin kalo masih ngaco... amatiran coi...

Duniamu Duniaku Dunia Kita

Apa yang sedang terjadi?
Ada apa dengan duniamu?
Ada apa dengan duniaku?
Dunia kita

Hai adik lihatlah
Akupun menangis
Akupun takut
Peganglah tanganku

Hai kawan dengarlah
Akupun cemas
Akupun gelisah
Pandanglah hatiku

Si pengotbah berseru
Ribuan wajah berlalu dihadapnya
Tapi hanya satu telinga
Hanya satu hati

Saat ini..nyawa tak ada arti
Diambil nafasnya
Hanya seperti menginjak semut
Mereka salah?

Dunia datang dari Sang Pencipta
Bukankah seharusnya indah?
Bukankah seharusnya damai?
Jika dunia karya-Nya?

Tapi dimana rasa itu?
Makin hari aku malah makin galau
Kisah kisah sedih,perih
Jadi aku harus berlari kemana?
Kurasa bukan cuma aku

Aku tahu
Kau bisa mendengar
Tangisan kami
Aku bisa rasakan sapaan-Mu
lewat sinaran mentari
beri aku tegar

Karena itu teman, ku berharap
Saat dimana kita bisa bergandeng tangan
Karena itu teman, ku menanti
Saat dimana kita bisa berpeluk
Saat kau dan aku adalah Satu
tak beda

Saat dimana di duniamu..
Duniaku..
Dunia kita..
Ada damai

9/11/2003, 10.05pm Sydney